In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
