He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
