I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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