As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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