I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize