you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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