Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
Randomize
