Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
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