Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
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