last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
Randomize
