so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
