therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
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