The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
