I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Yeah we were on bar number 7 on our bike trail and you decided to steal my bike and we found you 20 minutes later eating Cheetos in the shallow end of your parents pool
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize