im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
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