I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
