just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space