he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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