I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Bring me that man meat
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
Randomize
