why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
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