Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize