One girl and one boy is just not enough.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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