Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize