She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Apple Jack is not a good idea for breakfast. Whiskey can't replace milk.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Randomize
