Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
