We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
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"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
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I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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