So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
