dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
