i already hear my dad disowning me
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo