I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Randomize
