Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Randomize
