For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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