Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
