On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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