I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize