Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Listen. The next time my first idea in the morning is "hometown buffet and a water bottle full of captain morgan", please make me go back to sleep.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
