THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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