I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
Randomize
