I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize