She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
