NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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