people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
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