At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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