i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize