But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
