I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina can't take this anxiety. there is no way he is 19 and this smooth. he's lying about his age or he's a goddamn sexual prodigy
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
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