Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
That is true. Vodka is like a dog. Always loyal, warm, and there for you when you need it
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
