Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Congratulations! We have a period
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