He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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