it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
